First Day of School

Sarah started last week...

























....and is in heaven.



The boys started on Monday. (Yes, I see the pole in Adam's head.)


















It's a big school. It's different. It's going to be just great, but it's hard to be new. The kids are working on making friends. I asked Isaac what it was like to go to a new school and he said "It's just like going to preschool, but everyone else already knows each other."






On another note, I don't like living in a disorganized messy house; it contributes to me being discouraged. When I'm discouraged, I don't have the motivation to organize and clean. When I don't have motivation, nothing progresses much and I feel overwhelmed. When I feel utterly overwhelmed I have one of my bi-annual breakdowns. And that breakdown was tonight. Awesome.

Glum

So I think I'm....(just a moment while I check a thesaurus and look up a milder version of the word depressed - or at least a less used one)....discouraged, drained, debilitated, sad, weary, melancholy, in the blue funk, and glum. I would like to be cheery, encouraged, excited, and happy. Sure I've had good days, but I've noticed that the general pattern is trending down.

I KNOW there is LOTS to be happy about, but in my twisted way of thinking I'm finding myself focusing on smaller bothersome things rather than the big picture. I'm finding it tricky to navigate all of the relationships in my life, both old and new. I'm having lots of days left up to my discretion which opens the door for my ineffectiveness and lack of motivation.

I know that I am still mourning the loss of my old life and home. It's so hard for me to go back there and see the house that the new owner is making changes to or to talk to people that still run in those circles. I've considered that there may be some things that would be easier about moving far away and not having the chance to go back. I did need to go into the old school this week to get my hands on a report card that hadn't made it to me. But after? I sat in the car and cried. That is something that's hard for me to leave.

I know there is joy ahead of us here and I would make the same decision again. I'm excited about so many things and I have met loads of wonderful people, but transition is hard.
I imagine it will just take time.

Ugh. Blogger.

So my title is missing for a time. I can work around blogger's annoying tendencies when I have more peace, quiet, patience, motivation, and blog love.

Is anyone out there? Well, I take that back. I know you are. I look at my blog traffic on occasion, but it's so creepy to know that people look and never comment. I feel waaay more inspired to post if I feel like anyone is really interested in seeing it. I haven't even put pics up of my house yet! I have little idea of who reads this. Actually, I take that back too. I went to a baby shower in the old neighborhood last week and had a few people comment on my last post (the morning following when I put it up late at night). It was weird because I didn't realize they were looking. I don't mind much since my blog is public, but man I love comments.

Okay, so it's LATE at night and I've had a good (could have been fantastic if the kids had been a bit better behaved) but long day. I'm a little loopy and tired of trying to figure out what to do about my blog. Probably not the best time to put up a post. I'm really not needy, just busy so I have to decide where to put my time - blog or house? :)

On another note, do you know I'm really falling in love my new house? Like really? Yep. More each day. This week I feel a *bit* more settled.

Oh, also, Lynea made a surprise visit from Seattle this week. So unexpected and fun. I'm sure I've forgotten some things I was supposed to do or phone calls I was supposed to return and stuff like that, but it was worth it.